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A New Voice

by Mindful Wrath

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1.
MADMAN 02:15
Don't try to tell me that You didn't really mean it Don't try to tell me that You didn't enjoy yourself Roll down the windows and Scream it to the world: It's you and me, baby You and me, baby And if I didn't know you better I might say That you were doing all of this Just to impress me [Chorus] You're a MADMAN (But I like it that way) You're a MADMAN (But I like you anyway) You're a MADMAN (But I like it that way) So don't act sane whenever you're around me Now don't you think that We should get together Now don't you think that It don't get any better Stand on a rooftop and Scream it to the world: We're going crazy, going crazy Going, going, going If I didn't know you better I might say That you were doing all of this Just to impress me If I didn't know you better If I didn't know you better If I, if I, if I, if I [Chorus]
2.
Morning Beer 04:04
I wake up to the sound of music This clock can't carry a tune But in eight minutes, it's at it again From where I've thrown it across the room So I roll out of bed, looking sick and half-dead Make my breakfast, have some tea And I'm lucky if it hasn't occurred to me The past few days have really stunk I may as well get really drunk [Chorus] Crack open a morning beer Forget the glass and raise a cheer And drink it from the bottle 'Cause it's easier to swallow Crack open a morning brew At this rate I'll be drunk by noon And passing out by dinner Every one's a winner But the bottom of every bottle comes too soon And then it's time to hit the gym I hate it but I wanna stay thin And it keeps my mind off ... other things You don't know how bad it stings Get home sore and out of breath My hands are shaking half to death So I pop the cap, and cut the crap You know it's bitter, but I'm no quitter I can't even taste it then I can't feel my face again When I [Chorus] Oh dear, everything's spinning Oh dear, the fun's just beginning Oh dear, you look so demure Oh beer, there's nothing you can't cure From there, the rest of the day Passes in the usual way At least as far as I recall I remember some but not it all So I think I'll have just one drink more I think I'm puking on the floor Well you know I'm never gonna quit It's plain that you don't give a shit And I'm lucky if it hasn't occurred to me That the past four months have really sucked I may as well get really fucked So I Crack open a morning beer Forget the glass and raise a cheer And chug it from the bottle 'Cause it's easier to swallow Crack open a morning brew You know I ain't got shit to do I'll be passing out by dinner No one here's a winner But it's gonna be okay Although there isn't much to say You know I only get this way With you
3.
Hollow 05:05
You take what's yours; you're entitled And just ignore when I'm falling apart Wasn't it clear by the way that I cried Wasn't it clear that I wasn't alright I tear at my skin, at the poison But I'm breathing it in as you're breathing into me Tear at my skin, at the poison But I'm breathing it in, I'm breathing it in Take what's yours; you're entitled You take what's yours; you're entitled [Chorus] I'm hollow, I'm hollow, I'm hollow Cold as stone, in the afterglow Yours alone, with nowhere else to go I guess you thought you were doing no harm But this soft rot is losing its charm Nobody told me the rules of the game Nobody said that I don't have to play Just because I kept my silence That doesn't mean that I liked it Just because I kept my silence That doesn't mean that I liked it You won't hear 'no', so what answer's best For the question that you always pressed? [Chorus] (You're not entitled; you're not entitled) Soon I won't be hollow anymore Filling up the places left by all the things you stole I'll take what's left of me back to shore I'll find a place of bravery, I'll find someone to save me A way to make me whole I'm hollow, I'm hollow, I'm hollow Cold as stone, in the afterglow All alone, so maybe I'll just go Hollow, I'm hollow, I'm hollow
4.
Crumble 03:19
Not so long ago, I was out of my mind A self-inflicted tyranny of lies Searching through the shards of what I'd lost Only to watch them crumble Not so long ago, I was out on my own Trying to believe that I was not alone Holding on to hope as fragile as frost Only to have it crumble And I took your hand like poison Knowing where it would lead Not so long ago, I was faced with a choice To be alone, or abandon reason's voice So I chose to go despite the cost Only to watch myself crumble Don't waste your pity on me 'Cause I can't feel a thing
5.
Slow, and hide the truth again Don't let on that we're not friends Though it's tearing us apart No need to even start To try to make it right, I hate it, but There's no one else that I can blame For all the time I wasted Can't believe I wasted it on you But what a way to go What a way to go Never getting better, never getting over this We're never gonna get there, never gonna let it go We're never on the level, never getting out of here We're never gonna get there, never getting over this [Chorus] Don't like the sound, but I'll do what I must I'll grind myself down until every part that hurt you is dust Myself down until every part that hurt you is dust Guess I'm just too much, it's true Can't be myself and be with you, when Everything I do is criticized But it just wasn't enough To squeeze me down in the mold Well you'll be glad to know I've learned how it goes I'll never be quite worth it in your eyes Just keep away from me Keep away from me [Chorus] Don't tell me that it's my fault, and I won't tell you that it's yours Leave me to my anger, and I'll leave you to your wars Just so long as you stay gone, I won't have to pretend that you're not here Act like everything's all right, and I'll act like nothing is wrong Can't help hating the feeling, but I get the feeling it won't stop 'Til I erase you [Chorus] Turn it around, 'cause there's still something wrong I've cut myself down and now every part that loved you is gone Cut myself down and now every part That loved you is gone
6.
Did I not make myself clear When I said I don't want you here? Was it so hard for you to stand Without me in the palm of your hand? You don't know me You don't own me Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out (x3) And never come back [Chorus] While you cry in the dark alone Looking for a way to atone Feel like a sinner, deep inside your center Sick with guilt you can't condone But don't think you're the only one Who's sick to their stomach from what you've done Did you think it would help your case If you put me back in my place? As you dig yourself deeper still Think I won't, but believe me, I will [Chorus] Seek out the weak and pour out your regret on them Try to lay the blame on me, and see how far you get When your life is just a list of things you're dying to forget I don't know you I don't owe you Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out (x3) And never come back [Chorus] You don't think you're the only one Who's sick to their stomach from what you've done
7.
Back to the old haunt Don’t ask me what I want Indiscretions, loaded questions Back to the old game It’s always been this way Standard flirting, disconcerting I can take it, love to hate it On and on and on and on and [Chorus] I’m gonna get, gonna get what I’m after I’m a bitch, I’m a pitiful disaster Take it in stride, keep it inside, but if I Want to get mine, gotta get right So what if I haven’t been myself? I’m sick of me, I’d rather be someone else Gotta bury the truth ‘Cause if anyone knew They would hate me Take me or throw me out That’s what I’m all about All-or-nothing, someone’s bluffing Give me a reason why Baby, I’d rather die No mistaking, done with faking Get this straight, no we’ll be great So long as you don’t ever touch me [Chorus] [Bridge] Sought out my weakness, and found more regret Scarred by every attempt, although I never get All that far down the line, no I lose every time Blaming the scene, when the one constant’s me [Chorus] So what if I’ve been somebody else? I’m sick and fucking tired of being myself Meeting somebody new And it’s gonna fall through Gotta bury the truth ‘Cause if anyone knew They would hate me
8.
Don’t look at me, I’m a mess today Chasing myself, but I’m Getting away, getting away, getting Ahead of the game, I lost yesterday Tasting the ashes on Every word I say Oh, Honesty, can you spare me the pain? Rather be dead, but I’m sure it’s okay The lies all ran out, now, so what’s left to say? Burn it all down, burn it all down For all my mistakes, there’s a price to pay I’ve been killing myself, but I’m Taking a break, taking the day, taking a Path to escape, while I suffocate Spilling out embers with Every move I make Oh, Honesty, can you spare me the pain? Rather be dead, but I’m sure it’s okay The lies all ran out, now, so what’s left to save? Burn it all down, burn it all Oh, Honesty, will you spare me the shame? Rather be dead, but I'm sure I’m okay Turned it around, now it’s all up in flames Burn it all down, burn it all Burn it all down, burn it all Burn it all down, burn it all
9.
It's Mine 05:32
A bit of the grave, a little too brave The noise in my head growing violent When out of the throng, a siren song: “Let us make it quiet” So I followed and prayed, begging for aid Spilling my guts at that merciful shrine And they cut out my tongue, I was stupid and young But if I take it, then it’s mine Love turned to hate, too little, too late And Honesty made me her fool Riddled with doubt, I couldn’t get out They told me: “This will save you; Freedom begins with locking you in” Made powerless here by design Already tired and cold, I don’t need to get old But if I take it, then it’s mine “Come now, bare us your heart Show us the seams and we’ll take you apart Ceding control is the perfect start We’ll give you the lines if you play the part Darling, don’t cry, we don’t want you to die Three can keep a secret, if two of them lie” Foul-weather friends, means without ends The lines were crossed in silence “We love you to death, but don’t hold your breath All you’ve done is slight us Abused and deceived, but it’s worse if you leave” They dug up the wickedness buried inside Screaming “you must atone”, but we all die alone And if I take it, then it’s mine Pinch, pull, press and unwind (Pinch, pull, press and unwind) The price of the truth is a lifetime of lies (Why would you lie?) Nobody bothered to wonder why (It won’t matter why) I don’t even know if I want to die (We won’t let you die) Worn down to the bone, with nothing to show (Don’t let it show) Swear I’ll be good (Swear you’ll be good) If you'll let me go home “Sweet little thing, why won’t you sing? We built you a cage and you’re free now Free to obey, it’s better this way Baby, can’t you see how You’re begging for pain, you’re safer in chains Than selfishly placing one toe out of line Darling, we saved your life, now shut up and survive” But if I take it, then it’s mine
10.
Love was a story I told to pass the time But it never stayed long Ended wrong Obligatory If love’s the point of life, then I learned to live a lie Pressing on Heart withdrawn The perfect crime Nobody's stealing it I’m just not feeling it [Chorus] I just make do with the things That get me through the day No risk, no reward And that’s okay I guess it wasn’t meant to be The point of love was lost on me A stupid game Buried the flame Here lies the dream I stood on the threshold, celebrity contrived And I gave up the fight Lost the light Nothing special The things I fantasized were not a life I could survive Better doubt Selling out All the lies Thought I was made for it But I would have hated it [Chorus] I just make do with the things That get me through the day No risk, no reward And that’s okay They said I could be anything But I’m a joke I played on me Farewell fame Praise and acclaim Here lies the dream [Bridge] Something worth giving for Something worth living for Can’t stand that lifestyle Attraction, ambition A war of attrition 'Cause I just don’t see anything worthwhile [Chorus] So I’ll make do with the things That get me through the day No risk, no reward And that’s okay I'll get better, this is fine I know it’s no one’s fault but mine Here lies blame Here lies shame Here lies the dream
11.
A New Voice 03:25
"Silence, hollow and joyous Perfect, voiceless" Seven thousand aching nights I’ve failed again to come alive yet Bottled up and stoppered tight My heart entreats me to revive it Scheming study Lovely If I survive it [Chorus] Now I’ll make a new me Everything I am inside Breaking through me Won’t think twice if the only price Is the ruining of everything I’ve ever been Soon I’ll find a new voice Bury all that hasn’t died Make the true choice Cut my losses, and damn the cost ‘Cause whatever I become will sing again In the light of midnight’s grace Preparing for a vivisection Let the scalpel find its place I’m ready for my resurrection Screaming, bloody That’s just The price of perfection [Chorus] Now I’ll make me a new me Find a brand new voice If I get better When I get better NOW I’LL GET BETTER NOW I’LL SING WITH A BRAND-NEW NEW VOICE—
12.
Better 03:03
Hello, again, come meet the new me He's so much better than the old Gentle, comely, bitter and lonely But MOSTLY Courageous, expressive Attractive, progressive He's surely the best me Just don't look too closely [Chorus] Turn away, 'cause now I'm better Seize the day, a real go-getter Watch the show That's all you need to know I'm better! I'm better! Just move along, I don't have time now I gave up feeling with the come-down Back up slowly Don't get too close to me See through the holes in me Jealous, possessive Self-centered, obsessive And all of the rest of me Made up or STOLEN [Chorus] Perfectly perfect, don't check inside Everything fine until you had to pry Just look at the state of this sad little life It's boring and empty, not worth the time Bleak and depressing and most of all MINE [Chorus] Turn away – I'm better! I'm better! Seize the day – I'm better! I'm better! Watch me go – I'm better! I'm better! I'm better! I'm better! I'm better! I'm better!

about

Will you do me a favor? The first time you listen, let it be all the way through, beginning to end. Come walk with me through the body I built.

Special thanks to kalgalen for the cover art.

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released March 24, 2020

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Mindful Wrath Houston, Texas

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